sometimes it's hard to admit it, but really, none of us are perfect, especially me. this week has been jam packed with events that have made me step back and look at the bigger picture, and basically, accept that i am not exempt from crummy days and that i, too, have got lots to learn. so, i have a few confessions to make...
1.) i bribe my children. to go to bed, to eat their meals, to take their pictures, to quit bickering FOR GOODNESS SAKE!
2.) i bring ryder back to bed with me in the morning in hopes of getting a few extra zzzzz's
{life lesson #1...}
this doesn't work! if he's up. YOU'RE up! but don't quit trying.
the extra snuggle time is priceless.
3.) i always allow the kids to have more than one popsicle. i feel like it's a tease. i act as though they are stretchin' it by asking for another, but really, their not, i never give them one without the intentions of giving them another.
4.) sometimes... i need a break. not because i don't love them , but because i DO. {so much!}
5.) the happiest thing about ryder being potty trained, for me, is to not have to listen to josh gripe about dirty diapers.
6.) lexi NEVER stops talking. sometimes, i have to stop listening or else i would NEVER get anything done.
{life lesson #2...}
don't ever stop listening to that little voice. one day you will miss it severely and it will be painful!
7.) i have sold more pies for zach's fundraiser than he has. i will change this tomorrow.
8.) when i go out on dates with my husband, 75% of the time i am thinking about the kids. i think he is, too.
{life lesson #3...}
enjoy your time out with your husband. when you get home, you'll wish it would've lasted longer.
9.) my kids are monkeys... truly. at home depot they scale the racks and hide behind the paint buckets. i give them "the eye" as if it works because i know if i grab their arms they will drop to the ground in a screaming fit so that everyone thinks that i ripped the arm OFF. (thanks kids! it's a lovely feeling to be judged by every person in the entire store... quit acting like animals and i'll quit grabbing you by the arm.)
10.) i buy way more clothes for lexi than i ever have for zach and ryder combined. what can i say, girls stuff is just way cuter. sorry boys.
11.) lexi has asked me for a picnic in the park for 6 days in a row now. we haven't gone yet.
{life lesson #4...}
tomorrow, take your sweet and innocent child to the damn park for a picnic and thank god that she's not asking you if she can borrow the car instead.
12.) zach is the best babysitter, EVER! no, i don't leave him with them alone, but i ask him often what ryder is doing or where lexi went or to go get ryder for me or to help lexi wash her hands. thanks buddy.
13.) i am too afraid that my big butt will bust ryder and zach's bunk bed, so i never lay in zach's bed with him to read or just snuggle. the top bunk isn't always the best bed, i guess.
{life lesson #5...}
make sure ryder isn't on the bottom bunk and then climb your butt up to zach and snuggle with him next time he heads for bed. the moments you share cuddling with him will greatly outweigh the risks of breaking his bed... it will be worth it.
14.) my kids eat a TON of fruit snacks. no, not a banana or apple, the kind packed full of high fructose corn syrup and artificial coloring.
15.) sometimes i make the kids change if they've dressed themselves and we have somewhere to go.
{life lesson #6...}
the confidence your children will get from dressing them themselves is way more important than they way they are actually dressed. don't you EVER do that again!!!
16.) i don't have nearly as many pictures of zach as i'd like because when i typically pick up my camera he is at school, or spending half of his weekends away from us :(
i feel like i have way less time with him now that he's in school and i don't think it's fair.
{life lesson #7...}
get your camera out when zach is home! if you think your sad about it now, imagine what you'd feel like 10 years from now when he's all grown up!
17.) ryder's smile helps him to get away with way to much. even when he's being ornery, i just want to squeeze and kiss him.
i think that's enough confessions for one night!
here are some more from the day lexi, ryder and i went out searching for signs of fall. from indications posted above, i obviously wish that zach was with me on this day and spent some time in front of my lens, but he was away for the weekend and so i will just have to be happy with these.
and i am.
xoxoxo
tanner is a senior this year. {obviously} 
tanner is my cousin.
tanner is the chosen one each time josh and i feel we need a night away and leave the kids at home. my children {LOVE} this guy! 
tanner is fun and hillarious and full of life. 
tanner is a dare devil beyond explanation. this kid used to scare the you know what out of me when i watched him and his sister. as long as we were all still alive by the end of the night and the house wasn't burnt down, i felt i did a good job. seriously, the kid is brave! always has been! 
tanner is so sweet and kind and caring. what 17 year old boy, who is sitting in the movie line with all his buddies, would pick up a four year old little girl and hug on her and then take her brothers and tickle them and toss 'em in the air? this guy has a heart that is going to make some girl a very lucky wife someday! 
tanner was born when i was 8. i have loved and adored him ever since. 
this is tanner.... 
my cousin, the senior, my "kid watcher", my friend.
